help
I feel discouraged. Right now I don’t like my job and I feel like a failure. I feel like the stupid young girl who everyone takes advantage of. Maybe I should quit my job. I feel like I should have time to build my confidence and take up a hobbie, that way, when I get a job, I’m confident and won’t take things so personally. The owner of the store told everyone to give me a math lesson because the till was off a couple times. And I’m so depressed about it!!! It’s stupid. Any advice??
Sarah and Shelby replied:
Hey Molli, sorry your boss is being a stupid head. I think you really have several options of what to do and that the solution depends more on your attitude then anything else. If you feel like you need to be more confident, withdrawing from a situation that makes you insecure is likely to compound those feelings over time, (i.e. if you never say anything about this to your boss you may later feel like you ran away from the problem which could make you feel even less confident).
Confidence is likely anything else, it takes practice and this could be a great opportunity to practice confidence. I’m not saying you shouldn’t quit if you think that’s the best option for you- but if you do quit you should do it boldly and confidently; tell your boss that the insensitive comments were hurtful to you and that you deserve to be treated better then that and that that is the reason you are going to take your talents elsewhere.
Even if you don’t quit I think the best way to build confidence would be to address this issue head on with your boss, you can be kind and respectful but also be clear about your feelings and about why those comments were hurtful to you.
At any rate, whatever you job or hobby-wise do I think you probably need to deal directly with the problem or you may only feel more powerless in the long run.
You asked for advice, right? There’s a whole page of it, lol.
Hugs!
Sarah
October 21, 2007 at 3:22 pm. Permalink.
molli replied:
Thanks Sarah. I agree
I don’t like retail though. I don’t like how superficial it is. But then again, it’s hard to find a job at the age of 17 where your not working for other people, you know?
I’m just so stressed. I’m going to graduate soon and I need to sort things out in my own head, like what I want to do, and who I am. It’s hard to do that when i’m so so busy with a job and going to school all the time.
I don’t know if i’m just being a wimp.
October 21, 2007 at 3:38 pm. Permalink.
molli replied:
I think I might meet with Sheareen (The owner) like ask her to lunch or something, and discuss my thoughts.
She won’t be here for another month..
Good idea you think?
October 21, 2007 at 3:39 pm. Permalink.
Sarahs Mom. replied:
I have to agree with Sarah on this Molli.. Regardless to you staying or not in this job..You never have to or should you put up with someone treating you poorly..Your boss may not know she is hurting your feelings.
. but you hopfully you know what I mean 
But its still not ok..Always give respect in the manner you would like to be respected in dealing with such situations.Well really with everyone in your life..
October 21, 2007 at 9:30 pm. Permalink.
Cindy replied:
Hi Molli, So sorry things are so rough with work for you right now. I know it’s been tough for a while. I agree that you need to communicate with your boss about her cruel remarks. It doesn’t matter if you are young, she needs to show you respect and keep her unkind remarks to herself.
You may want to keep in mind that you have been unhappy at this job and have had an uphill battle because of the managment for some time. It appears (from what I’ve seen and heard from you and Sterling) that the managers are very unprofessional and juvenile, self-centered and disrespectful. It seems that it creates a very negative atmosphere for you to work in. You can’t change these people and it’s not your responsibility to do so. Your only choice is to put up with the negative atmosphere, or leave it. You are a smart girl who can learn a lot from professional management who appreciates your talent and willingness to learn the trade–whatever that trade may be.
I don’t recommend “job hopping” or running from controversy or unpleasantness. No job or manager is perfect and we all have to learn to deal with certain things. But sometimes you have to set boundaries when it comes to things like blatant disrespect and being treated badly–and those boundaries may mean looking for another job. You are very young and have a lot to explore in order to find what you really want to do. If you are finding retail superficial and not to your liking, this may be a good time for you to explore other possibilities.
Just my two cents worth…
October 22, 2007 at 2:59 pm. Permalink.
molli replied:
Hey Cindy I got your message yesterday but I was at work otherwise I would have picked up. It was soooooo sweet Cindy I really appreciate you.
Sterling and I had a good refreshing talk lastnight so i’m more confident, and working on it.
October 23, 2007 at 4:32 pm. Permalink.
gardenmuse replied:
Dear Mollibear
Why not just marry a rich guy and trap him with some kids?
-gardenmuse
November 6, 2007 at 1:43 pm. Permalink.
Smoot-Kent replied:
Tills are always off! It just depends on how much we are talking about.
January 19, 2008 at 2:47 pm. Permalink.